HOW TO HAVE SENSE

A compulsory guide for the 21st generation.

Hollup — wait a minute — it’s Charpa...

“Perspective” is everything.

Just like the above phrase, How did you read the title? What were your interpretation to the title? What were your expectations?

Hence, while some felt insulted by the title (How to have sense), others smirked, some genuinely went gaga knowing fully well they will laugh till the end, while some certain “somes” couldn’t wait to launch into this write-up because they will learn a life hack here also. Either ways, you are welcome to another series of your favorite sarcastic write-ups.

SENSE

I am delighted to inform you that sense (a universal common traits in humanity), is not given to everyone at the same time or age of growth. Ignorance has clinged unto many like; “till death do us part”. It is not their faults though, it is but one of these few things:

• Environment of up-bringing (ghetto or civilized grounds).
• Level of exposure (IQ).
• Types/ kind/ class/ forms of friends you keep (since our teachers couldn’t decipher properly, the meaning of any of these terms, enjoy in my confusion too).
• Kind of movies you watch (Nigerian Yoruba movies — IQ degrader or American movies— only scholars can relate).
• Ego and Pride (unwilling to learn)
• Bulk of superstition you have heard (if rain and sun is shinning; if you know, you know).
• Money in your account (yes! even 5k makes people loose their common senses)
• Well, you also know the one that is peculiar to you.

Sense basically is expressed in your response during conversations, how you react in situations, decisions you make, changes you enact, attitudes and conduct etc. Many reasons why people just go numb on you or they all of a sudden become weakened are because of your reactions and responses. For instance, giving your crush your school fee to buy her Brazilian wig (proof of your love😍), calling the cops on your parent because they scolded you (well, not so realistic in Nigeria), praying in tongues in front of your burning house (keep at it, the angels are coming with fire truck), answering “z” for a simple “a” question (hmn hmm! 😒).

The Instance are actually many, but let’s have them in our thoughts. Just reflect back at all the stupid things you did that didn’t include common sense in them.

Ahh! Opooor yeye 😭

GOOD NEWS

Sense can be learned and developed over time. Don’t loose hope. Rejoice and be glad, for your set time to possess sense is here.

Although, there is a thin line between societal expectations and your personality traits that may cause you to react in certain ways you don’t find pleasing to you but to the society, is normal. Let’s break this down to a formula:

1. Your norms = anti-society norms (not all the time)
2. Society norms = anti-personal norms (not all the time)

In English!

What you find as normal may not be what the society sees as normal. For instance, a male who loves to wear female clothes. To him, it is normal but to the society, it is not. So also what the society may see as normal may not be what you as an individual view as normal. For Instance society says use cutleries to eat all swallow food but your unavoidable African nature is calling your mighty hands to feats faster.

So therefore, to properly fit into the world, to avoid being dragged on social media, to avoid people looking at you like some dumb person who can’t relate with jokes or certain slangs and phrases, it is expedient for you to learn how to mix societal norms together with your norms to produce common sense. Hence,

• Your norms + society norms = Sense

HOW TO DEVELOP SENSE OVERTIME

It is a must that I buttress on the fact that you have to be intentional about “learning”. If your pride and ego or whatever that you know exist within you will get in the way of your learning, you need to drop it else, you may be viewed the same way by society and may never notice till death do you part. capisce?

1. VIEW FROM OTHER PERSPECTIVES: Your views to you will always be right, but take a step back and view it from other angles before you act.
2. WEIGH THE OUTCOME OF YOUR INTENDED DECISIONS AHEAD: Just before you speak or carry out that decision, observe/ access the benefits and or consequences. Be slow to speak but fast to think.
3. SEEK FEEDBACK FROM YOUR TRUSTED FRIENDS: From time to time, you want to evaluate how you have improved. Hence, speak to people and ask for their opinions. PS: as much as you feel you don’t need people’s opinions to live your life, mentally you actually do (read on mental models later).
4. ALWAYS CREATE ROOM FOR LAXITY: Relax! not everyone you think have sense actually fully do. Some also have their dumb moments. They don’t just show it to the world. So if you make a mistake or display lack of sense at anytime, accept and move on knowing fully well that you are still intentional about getting better.
5. BE YOU AND DO YOU: Imitating someone else’s attitude, character, personality, way of speaking, appearances is actually deceitful and is a crime. Just because people love and flock around “a” doesn’t mean you as “b” should copy the entire life of “a”. Be you! because everyone else is taken and everyone else has their own comma. No one is like you. You are uniquely special. Accept it and move ahead by shaping your inabilities and getting better.

Don’t ever say Solanke Olamilekan never did anything for you. I am rest assured that by now, sense has been added unto you. Now go forth into the world and display a brighter sense. Please clap for this write up if you can and follow me for more.

I remain yours always.